Sometimes good people get a bad rap because of poor behavior by others. And sometimes I allow it without intention. It happens every time that I react to someone based on my assumptions of their motives. I may have valid arguments for my assumptions that relate to other life experiences, but that’s the fallacy in the old adage that one bad apple spoils that whole bunch… and the truth in the one about assumptions!

There’s something about me that you should know, though. I believe that there are way too many causes that don’t actually need to exist. At some point, we forgot how to be decent and everyone decided they needed to protest for something we weren’t being decent about. Mind you, correcting our misses as a society is crucial, but I’m not a fruitist just because I believe I should probably eat more fruit.

That said, I am also not a feminist. Do I believe that there can be a terrible imbalance between genders? Sure. Do I believe in pure equality? Nope. You know, there’s a reason that men’s clothing and women’s clothing are made differently. Wanna know what it is? We’re different. Shocker, I know!

Women can do a lot of things men can do, and men can do a lot of things women can do. But seriously? I wish that some would get their head out of the sand long enough to realize that some things in life you literally just have to deal with. Will men generally be stronger? Yes. Will women generally be better at nurturing? Yes. Will men generally get that funky boy smell? Ugh, yes. Will women generally cry for inexplicable reasons? Mmm, yep.

And you know what? It is what it is. There is one point though that, while it is likely an inevitable a part of life, it is extremely frustrating. It’s a pretty big point in the feminist movement right now, but, truth be told, I don’t remember the hashtag or whatever. You know what it is? Objectification.

Now maybe I just never paid attention to how men actually flirted before; but I’ve decided that I’m over it. I’d rather get a compliment on my intellect or one of my quirks than to be told that I’m hot any day. But for whatever reason, that’s just not how it happens. I’ve been paying attention the last few months, and I’m pretty sure that if I started dressing like I lived in the prairie days the ‘compliments’ would cease from each of their respective sources.

To each of those sources, though: I’m not here for you. I never will be.

Furthermore, your actions and statements make it very difficult for women such as myself to differentiate when a man is interacting with me in a manner quite opposite of you. You cause me to doubt when someone is actually genuine and say stupid things. I think I need to protect myself and end up strong-arm-ing someone who didn’t deserve it. Don’t get me wrong, there are a whole multitude of reasons why I say stupid things, but your objectification is most definitely one of them.

So, for the sake of my sanity… please stop. It’s not that I’m concerned you’ll convince me or that I can’t hold my own, but I’ve been trying really hard over the last year or so to only respond to people based on their statements and actions. Your douche-baggery though is one of the hardest to combat. Although I will admit that may not be a bad thing that it’s the hardest to put in a compartment.

But seriously, if you know nothing about me, know this… I’m not here for you.

And that’s intentionally written with truth in every interpretation.