Not all that long ago, I heard a song on the radio that caught my attention. You know those ones where you grab your phone and try to Google the lyrics you remember before you can’t remember them anymore? That’s what I did.

I caught these lyrics about digging the roots up, and then I missed a line, but I knew it ended with “Hallelujah”. It took me a few minutes, but I finally found it. Since that day, this particular song has become a quick favorite of mine. I’ve brought it up to a few different friends and want to incorporate it into a worship service somehow. Depending on what type of device you are using, if you either look to the right or scroll to the very bottom, you should see the lyrics to ‘Look What You’ve Done‘ by Tasha Layton.

If you’re not familiar with my blog, nine months ago, I wrote about The Wedding Ring that I’d been wearing on my finger since early December. I also wrote in March about The Day I Cried at the Gym when I met God on the stairmaster in a way that shifted my direction in a way that only God could have.

Now, I’m sitting here thinking about these lyrics… Look at me now. Look how You made me new. Oh, the enemy did everything that he could do. Oh, but look what You’ve done. You know what I can’t help but think about? I’m not who I was nine months ago. I’m not even who I was five months ago… not even one.

Throughout the month of July, when I would wash my hands, my ring would begin to slip off every time. I’m not really sure what would have changed in terms of my hand size. That’s usually not something I see a difference in. Historically, in the heat of the summer, my rings tend to get stuck on my hands, so this slippage seemed to be rather foreign… and then I did what I do and began to really contemplate what was happening.

Sometimes we need something to help anchor us in who we are. It may be something that lasts forever, or it may be something that lasts for a time. Only we can know and evaluate where we are, compare it to where we want or need to be, and determine what to do with the difference. As we go through life, learning and growing, that difference will twist and shift and become reshaped. So has mine. So when I took my ring off about two weeks ago, I stared at it for a while. Then do you know what I did? I put it back into my jewelry box and smiled at how I’ve grown.

I absolutely would love to wear a ring on that finger again, and I would love for it to be a ring presented to me in the purest of moments, representing a commitment that will last the rest of my life. However, God’s done a lot of work in me. He’s shown me some things about what that daydream could look like, and absolutely nothing else would be worth my time or energy. I don’t need an “I’m taken” ring anymore to keep my perspective. I know the conditions under which I would consider myself available, and I know that while those are waiting to come to existence, I’m still absolutely set in who and Whose I am.

No longer do I feel the need to hide behind a physical shield because I know my heart is sitting solid behind a Cornerstone. I look forward to whatever God will allow, but my identity and my experiences will not hinge on the “maybe someday” or in the waiting for it. I will no longer exist in search of acceptance. I will no longer exist in search of importance. I will no longer exist in search of what God’s already provided for me. And you don’t have to either.

Be good to you, my friends. You’re worth it.